Sunday, April 8, 2012

I wrote this one four days after I wrote the previous one.  Again, Stephen Elliott, though this one pertains much more to the tangible, though it's also quite visceral.  Nothing I write could ever approach Elliott's brilliance or wit, but I try.  I try, and I don't.  I don't want to be him, I want to be me.  But the best version of me.  So, I try, and I try.

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This is going to be about flow. Not rhythm; more like time, chronology. How you get from point A to point B. Or rather, how I got from point A to point B. Two very different times.

The first is a happy story. It's happy because point B was very clearly an improvement over point A. I went from ignorance to knowledge, and what I gained was fruitful and good. At point A, I was disappointed because I had finished watching the last episode of an amazing TV series: Coupling. Really witty British sit-com about three men and three women in their late twenties/early thirties (I know what you're thinking, and while teenage-me would be appalled by the words I'm about to type, it is worlds more sophisticated and entertaining than Friends). I was in my pajamas but it didn't matter. The point was that I was happy, but not happiest. The show enriched my recreational life, but then it went the way of all great art, and ended. In my search for MORE, I stumbled upon an internet discussion thread where users went to mourn the end of Coupling and find an antidote to fill the gaping void. The IT Crowd was suggested, seconded... I watched it. Bingo! I recognized Chris O'Dowd from his role as the goofy but charming cop in Bridesmaids. Here he played a geeky and bumbling IT worker for a large soulless corporation. His wacky facial contortions and comedic timing were superb, but the real show-stealer in my opinion was his clueless sidekick, Maurice Moss. Played flawlessly by a poker-faced Richard Ayoade, “Moss” is a socially awkward nerd of epic proportions who totes a backpack to work, enjoys role-playing games a la Dungeons & Dragons, and still gets beat up as if he were an easy grade school target. Suffice it to say, I was in love. When I'd finished The IT Crowd, I knew exactly from where my next fix would come: Ayoade. I was dismayed to discover, however, that he hasn't exactly had the most prolific acting career. Read: I'd just watched about 92% of it. He had written and directed a movie called Submarine; an indie coming-of-age flick. It looked hit-or-miss, but I just flipped over it. Subtle but forceful, with detestable yet sympathetic characters brilliantly portrayed by British no-name child actors, I couldn't get enough. The soundtrack was incredible, too. Soulful folk rock guitar tunes with a soothing male tenor. Turns out, it was Alex Turner, a British musician with a solo album (the movie soundtrack) and a band called the Arctic Monkeys. Well, I was hooked. On both. On all of it. On all of this. On the beauty of the process. From point A to point B. One day I'm watching Coupling, the next I'm rocking out to the Arctic Monkeys. Life. Sweet stuff.

This next story is a sad one. It's the age-old story of unrequited love and the poor choices we make in the name of dulling the pain. In fact, the more I think about it, the less interesting and noteworthy this story becomes. I like a guy. He's (basically) married. I got drunk, because, well, why not? Now I sit at my computer, hung-over, writing this discourse about my course and the blood courses coarse from a night of drinking and as a matter of course I tell myself I'll never drink again and of course it's a lie and the course of life and love never did run smooth of course it always seems so simple when you think you're at rock bottom but the twists and turns are of course inevitable and not only that they're the best part. But of course you don't know that yet. Maybe you never will.

And of course, time marches on.

Love & peace,
"Mary"

PS My Dad was the one who called me that. There's a real sadness there. Of course, there always will be.

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